16 August 2013

The Best Marriage Advice EVER

Every once in a while, I get e-mails or comments from people asking for relationship advice and it makes my eyes pop out of my head cartoon character style. While it's super flattering, and it's true that I love my relationship with Monsieur Right, I really wouldn't feel honest about giving you any advice. In fact, I would feel like a bit of a moron. Here's why.

I've only been married 8.5 months! 


I'm proud of the fact that our marriage has lasted longer than many celebrity marriages. But we're still in the sappy, "I love you more" - "No! I love YOU more!", honey moon phase and probably will be for a couple more years - which is just fine, dandy, and wonderful! But because everything is still sunshine and rainbows, my advice doesn't really count.

No couple, after 8 months of marriage has really been through enough ups and downs to tell you what works in "the long run." Because honey, there ain't nothing long (yet) about their marriage. They can only honestly tell you what's kept them together for 8 months, so far.

Truth be told, any one who's been married less 5 years and feels like they have enough authority to hand out "marrital advice" should be taken with a grain of salt. This is the equivalent of a mother of a two year old giving you advice on how to raise a teenager. She's just got her feet wet when it comes to parenting, and though she may have a few good ideas, she just hasn't had enough time to see how they pan out yet.

Sorry. I've only just gotten my feet wet with this whole marriage thing.



I really don't mind and actually quite enjoy some of the blogs where newly weds talk about their marriage goals/date nights. I've gotten some great ideas that way.

It's also really cool when they talk about their struggles, and what they've done to over come them. Sometimes, people who've been married for a while forget what surprised them when they were first married, so reading about other couples who are going through the same struggles can be helpful.

I even remember, shortly after the wedding, posting my favorite advice that we'd received from other couples, because I didn't want to loose/forget it. But that's as far as I'll go as a newlywed. You certainly won't see me telling someone else how to run their marriage on here - at least not anytime soon! ;)

That just wouldn't be credible, nor honest.



I minored in Human Development & Family Studies, which means I took a ton of classes about family life and marriage. The statistics were fascinating, and I enjoyed reading my textbooks way more than I think you're supposed to. Unfortunately, at this point in my life, any advice I could give would just be verbatim what I've studied, and not based on any solid personal experience.

If anyone were interested in reading that, they could just buy the textbook.

But I can tell you this: A lot of the popular "advice" you read on Pinterest and blogs would make any credible therapist cringe. Like everything else you find on the internet, it should really be taken with a grain of salt.

However, I am super flattered when you ladies come to me asking for advice. I wish I had the miracle formula for a happy marriage to share with you all. But the truth is that relationships are so different. What works for us, might not work for you.

..............................................

This might just take the prize for being the lamest advice post ever, but at least I was sincere.

Now, if you're looking for dating advice, that's a different story. I have lots of stories about who not to date and avoiding creepers. I even try to give the guys a bit of advice when I tell the story of my worst date ever, part 1 and 2. Yes, it really was that bad.

Actually, I'm not really an expert on how-to date. I'm more of an expert on how-not-to date.

Also, if any of you are curious, last Friday, I opened the blog up to questions. Questions about me, about life in France, about blogging, etc. I'll be answering them over the course of the next month, so if you're curious about something, it's not too late to ask. I will respond to all of them, even if my response is that I don't have an answer.

Happy Friday friends!


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